my head hurts.....poof.....super ruff dae todae...
two incidents happened....both involving me.....cant help but feel i'm soooo useless....2 tantrums frm same student....the ferst one was in the pantry where he threw his unfinished rice into the sink....so had to make him clear the sink....den he asked fer toothpick i told him to wait n wash his fork n spoon ferst....den i knew he was gg to start tantruming...n i noe he was gg to throw the fork n spoon down the window....but i failed to stop him.....next he threw a flask of water on the floor.....when my colleagues got him into the calm rm....he took off his pants n peed inside...my boss hoo just came back frm a trip cot him doing dat....
when it was time to go home...i brot them down tho i wasnt on duty...cos some of them not free...den he started his tantruming in the lift...when we reach ferst level...he refused to come out....i struggled wif him fer v long....at least i felt like it was ages....trying ever so hard to get him out of the lift...he just stood at the end of the lift refusing to budge...i did not even tink of physically restraining him....cos a lot of hospital staff was having lunch there....n all of them saw wad happened to me within a few seconds....we went in n out of the lift fer so mani times...he threw his sandals dunno how mani times....i picked up his sandals dunno fer how mani times....den he bent down to look at my eyes so klose to my face fer a few times....tada...n i officially joined the drums section of his percussion group....together with my other 4 colleagues...we form his drum sets....smacked me on the head like some combo hits...n den on my back...too fast fer me to react...n i felt someone pull me awae...it was a lady hoo wanted to take the lift...she n another lady still insistent on taking the lift aft seeing wad happened....den the next moment when i came to my senses my boss was standing next to me...one of my colleagues asked him to come rescue me...."wear ur shoes now!" he shouted n thump thump thump! he kena smacked on his head too....lucki i got fringe...boss forehead abit barren so can see dat it turned red....but he din get hit as much as i did....den suddenly he dashed out to the crowd having lunch....n sat down on the sofa....i ran to catch up wif him....he pointed at the stall....i noe he wanted to eat...but the sch bus waiting fer him...all of a sudden he got up n i quickly pulled him wif me n ran together to the bus n shoved him in.....wanted to throw his sandals out again....gosh...quickly put it on one side n locked the door n quickly waved gdbye...pooooof......
while i was inside the lift wif him....i realli felt so helpless...no one to help me out of the situation.....just like how he felt....we were both trapped....he din understand me...i din understand him...n being his teacher (tho not his main teacher)...i cant help him....at all....can onli becum the object fer him to vent his frustrations on....cant help but cried...not cos my head was hit...but i realli was at such a lost....i'm realli not an effective teacher...there's still so much so much more i nid to learn...i nid all the experience in the world to help me deal wif dem....dat is if i can haf more den one life.....
my head hurts....my heart pains...n my confidence shattered....