tis the last week wif my klass emmanuel....hate to leave the students....hate to leave my co-teacher eva....we'll both be in different klasses frm mon onwards....we've been toking alot these daes....reminiscing all the times we had...all the farnie tings the students did dat we will rem them fer....doubt i will c my klass often tho i m just next door...will be bz wif all the lil kids i guess....the students i miss most will be ben n tiff....
new klass means stepping out of my comfort zone...mi n eva r so used to them dat every little ting dey do we noe n can anticipate...(tho we mite not haf the ability to stop)....all coming to an end tis fri....
ends at 3:03 PM
Wednesday, January 24, 2007Y
even before 11am i'm like exhausted le....the class is realli having a big conspiracy!! each one of them taking turns to irritate mi n eva....come on la....it's the last 2nd week we gonna be u guys' teachers k....bryan realli pissed me off...persistently come n twist my arm...or eva's....mostly mine....fighting is tiring....den tis zr has been so gd fer weeks todae suddenly started crying fer no reason....vanessa has been bugging us on all her requests n wanting to go home badly....tiff n ben in their self talk....noisy....kai wei kept screaming cos the rest stressed him out....afternoon klass jm wasnt so cooperative...din realli wan to try wadeva i gave her unless i persist....luffed so loudly she rocked the whole hospital....after werk gotta rush fer 2 piano lessons....had to miss dnr...reached home feeling so weary n braindead....
ends at 7:37 AM
Saturday, January 20, 2007Y
Check out my Slide Show!
ends at 2:23 AM
so dat is y my left eye has been twitching n twitching!! mi gonna werk wif the newbie hoo is kinda irritating....gosh....mi n her in the same klass!! haiz....all my other old colleagues came over to 'comfort' me after the meeting....haa....also, i'm still gg to take 2 sessions....even tho all my other colleagues have to take onli one session as promised....well mabbe dat's cos i started the 2 session late...so now i'm making up fer it....pengs....lucki afternoon klass onli mon n wed fer the time being....they promised me aft 2-3 mths i will get some relief....hmm...let's c....
i'm not so sad bout werking wif cindy but more of me leaving my klass of a yr....kinda noe dem quite well oreadi now haf to let go....but i'm sure the new arrangements will be of benefit to the klass...cos i tink my colleague super patient...i'll be taking a younger lot tis time....arnd 12 yrs old....guess i'll start getting backaches soon.....four students altog...wif 2 new students coming next week.....hope feb never comes.....
the occupational therapist came yest n observed my klass....he was quite helpful...giving us some tips wif how to handle different students....he said must b firm wif B...i said i did....he said u guys r too kind....must be very firm....so i started being firm....shouted at him...he stopped but not completely....but my new colleague still sae i dun sound firm....pengz.....i dun wan to bark at him....i dun wan him to feel hurt....but i dun wan him to continue the wae he is....how to be firm n not fierce? it's difficult to draw a line across the two....
ends at 1:29 AM
Sunday, January 14, 2007Y
haven rested enuff...in fact had v lil slp tis weekend.....yest morning go to my piano teacher's hse...den evening went pitstop wif sports camp o comm pple.....din meet up fer so long thot i wld b very awkward...but ok leh....still can click....we r even planning a chalet man....kool....kept playing taboo but my group wif brandon n zhehao not doing too well...haa....but wadeva...it's just a game....it's a gd wae to ferget all worries....still crappin along.....shaikh was a lil scarie when he started having black face from 12am to 1am.....dat's his zone out time....no point toking to him....n after 1am he started chatting happily...haa...farnie....catching up was gd...tho all of us playing different roles in life now....wah...but the ride home was scarie...haa...130km/h....mi n zy holding hands when gg down the slope at je lo....rollercoaster ride...phew...reach home at 2+ den mark theory papers till arnd 4am den sleep.....
next morning woke up at 7am to go eat breakfast n den teach till 3pm....came home to make cards fer frens...den went out wif jc frens fer dnr....dunno y my jc frens sumtimes v rubbish one....ask me do stoopid tings....kip taking fotos...den ask me put arms arnd wing n take pic....crazy...not gg to do dat lo...later gf come find me....n he still sae gf wun mind....crap....sometimes i feel ar...lucki not wing's gf...not dat i haf ani chance of dat la....he's gg exchange again fer 1/2 a yr man....he's alwiz travelling n not in spore....how to maintain r/s...i realli wonder...hmm...rong used to change gfs often...now better....an like to tok crap....actualli the 3 musketteers all do dat....n all quite lame....every time aft meeting dem i will feel kinda down....stoopid...alwiz sae my face big....bleah!!! it's true...so wad??
n tmr got to go werk.....got morning n afternoon klass somemore...no time fer lunch....oh no....JM coming w/o the mum tmr....hope everyting will be fine....hope the next week will pass without getting serious injuries...haa...blue-black never mind....*pray hard*
tho a tiring wkend...but i enjoyed it...nice to catch up wif some old frens....haven been kiping myself so bz over weekends....n i must promise myself to start werking hard....no more slacking....yesh~
ends at 9:09 AM
Saturday, January 13, 2007Y
disheartened...
tink i'm a loser....
dunno what i do well in life....
can onli tink of all the failures i haf....
with more students scoring poorer n poorer....
with increased behaviors at the centre....
leaving me with more bruises....
leaving me feeling hurt....
maybe i din put in enuff effort...
maybe effort dun pay off...
no goals, no dreams....
no stand, no opinions.....
how great....
ends at 12:47 AM
Wednesday, January 10, 2007Y
it's onli the 3rd dae of the week i've got bruises on my arms, smacked on the face, pushed (till i nearly flew awae), and turning deaf frm the ear-deafening luffter in an echoey room....sigh.....my new student's mum damn farnie...tok to me fer the full 2 lessons....listen till i tired....tell my everyting bout her family n how she kips quarrelling wif husband....told me to look carefully in a guy, start family young, blah blah blah.....make me more more withdrawn....she said everyting in such a candid manner dat i cant help but luff tho i shldnt....she told me bout the suicides she planned to take....the 7 abortions she had....all these in the ferst two times we meet....best....
had some miscommunication and unhappiness in the office yest....i'm not involved but i could indirectly feel the aloofness in my prog head....i dunno if dat's healthy....boss brot up the issue of us grumbling at werk...."dun grumble among urselves...go tok to a wall or come to me...cos when u tok to others it's gg to affect dem too..." wad the....tok to the wall??! will it ever help? perhaps fer a while...but wif no actions taken...we will still face the same prob again....
more changes....gg to change klass AGAIN...dunno where i will b but i'll definitely miss my klass....sobz....dey promised we will all be teaching onli one session wef frm feb....chey...i'm not gg to believe dat.....dey alwiz gif us false hopes....i'm not gonna fall fer it again....once bitten, twice shy....
kinda discussed bout werk wif my other colleagues...all of us dun intend to stay fer long...as much as i wld love to stay n grow old wif my students, if the werking env is gg to be mismatched wif my expectations, i wld leave too....
earlie in the morning so pissed wif my new colleague....she's in her 20s too but i just cannot click wif her man...she came at 7.30 dunno fer wad...she dun haf key so come liao oso nowhere to go....i reached earlier to do my werk...den she nth to do she SAT DOWN RIGHT BESIDE ME N WATCH ME DO MY WERK!!! how absurd is dat??!! no privacy....no private space....n she din even ask if she can sit beside me! watch everyting i type n watch how i do up my resources....how i check mail....wld ani sane person do dat?? dun she haf ani sense of appropriateness?? worse is when she's attached to my klass tis week....din bother to tok to her much....argh....irritating....
ends at 6:00 AM
Sunday, January 07, 2007Y
tink i nearly died or at least gg to faint todae....my stomach so pain till i cannot stand up str....poof...dunno gastric or wad....felt better after food....2nd time i got such surge of pain liao....gosh....
was so shocked tis morning...was at rc when a lady popped her head into my rm so quietly dat i jumped a bit...n to my surprise it was my ferst 3 mths fren....haa...she actualli started teaching tuition at the same rc todae...so coincidental....=)
ends at 6:33 AM
poof....long time nia buy presents fer frens liao....one shot buy 4! pengz....
ends at 6:27 AM
fri was so tired after packing up the whole office n my table n had to go meet up my pri sch frens....wanted to pang seh tho i was on my wae there cos v tired...not dat it was such a dread but not klose wif dem la...but was quite glad dat i was there la....at least tok to michelle bout our fates as psych grads...haiz...tis time round highest turn up rate tho yihui din go....more gers this time...all of dem quite loud...heh....so can cover me up....=P alwiz feel dat my pri sch frens all high-flyers....v stress....haa...of cos not fergetting we haf a mr bukit batok-turned mr singapore classmate....haa....not a lot of things in common betw all of us but still manage to crap the nite awae...haa....i guess the onli connection was probably zw....he knew practically every1 quite well...n it's alwiz when he comes back or leaving fer aust den we'll get a chance to meet up....was realli amazed when michelle wrote out the WHOLE class list wif register number, full english name plus chinese name....all except billy's chinese name she dunno how to write....winner....superb memory.....cant even rem wad my register number was.....all of us still look quite the same....except fer lin bin whom i nid a lil more time to identify.....n fer goodness sake....we all knew each other fer more den half our lives!!! faintz.....
ends at 5:48 AM
Thursday, January 04, 2007Y
the lil perks in life....
when a mother of one student in my klass (but not my direct student) wrote inside the communication book: "during the holidays, V said "i wan to go to sch!", "i wan to sit in uncle's van! (the sch bus)" n "i miss serene!"
hee....so touched...but scared her teacher-in-charge not too happie....hmm...or mabbe she misses my hair more den me...haa...n note dat she said she misses serene...not misses miss serene....haa...sounds like a tongue-twister....
=]
ends at 7:15 AM
Tuesday, January 02, 2007Y
my wishes fer 2007.... (i wun call dem resolutions cos i'm not resolute enuff to make them come true....so i guess 'wishes' is the word...but in my dictionary, wishes dun come true either....hmm....)
i hope....
to stay happie wif my job no matter wad may come....
i haf more energy to get on wif life....
to stop wrinkles frm developing....
my family stays healthy n happie....
to haf time to practise piano consistently....
to haf less students who fail....
to appreciate every single moment dat i live...
these r onli hopes...no action plans to make dem come true...but will kip dem at the back of my mind...hehe....
ends at 9:16 PM
Monday, January 01, 2007Y
while packing my stuff i chanced upon all the lil memoirs dat everyone gave me i still kip dem intact bdae cards, fotos, souvenirs... i look thru them everytime i clear my stuff
frm my pri sch... i found lotsa goon do looking pics n my ACES day cap where i got everyone to sign on it...some of which had faded off... i found a fren hoo just added me at friendster n said he rem me making fun of his name....oops... but i tink i haf lost my autograph book....
frm my sec sch.... i found more fotos...lots more...more candid shots...pics where i was caught unaware...pics of outings, pics at comp club...all the fun daes we had...all the mixing arnd wif pple frm all the batches... i found the souvenir my asst sect gave me when she went london...bdae presents the juniors gave me....the neoprints i used to take wif my batch n some seniors... but i tink i haf lost my playfulness....
frm my jc... i found the letters i used to exchange wif one of my jjc frens...the pics of my klass 00s10...i recall the big vdae heart dat we made..... i found quite a number of fotos of ajc 24/00...but mostly in the same orientation...either gers a row, guys a row or gers on the left, guys on the rite...guess dey were more structured...heh i found the chinese poems n phrases dat the teacher laminated n gave to us as mementos.... i found my chinese essay dat she actualli sent fer competition tho she kinda feels i'm lousy.... i found my prom nite pics (i looked damn ugly!) n the regret of not taking pic wif my idol.... n of cos...the card dat s gave me where he used my name to write a chinese poem...haa.... but i tink i haf lost my enthusiasm...
frm my temp werk at cpf... i found a very nice bkmark my supervisors gave....so nice i dun want to use...lest i spoil it... i found siang leng whom i haven tok to fer a long time just added me at friendster.... but i tink i haf lost my chattiness....
frm uni.... i found nth much except a few good uni frens...n lotsa hi-bye frens... i finally rem the thick eyebrow guy's name....dat was wad qy alwiz called him...matthew...the name alone sends me shudders.... i found the sports camp pple hoo r trying to org a gathering aft so long....daes at the camp were the most happening daes i had there i guess.... most of the uni life is when i get tog wif my previous sch frens...used to go np to look fer zm...i oso fergot y...to rot tog i guess...wander arnd when pple drived...go pulau ubin fer the ferst time wif wing, an, wenqi and wendy....go chalets wif jjc frens, aj frens, sec frens.... i found the autumn leaf i asked e to collect fer me frm korea...he told me i had been v cold towards him last time..well...i admit la...heh...but i promise i wun b animore k...haa... but i tink i haf lost my energy....
out of so mani so mani stuff dat i found... i treasure ur postcards most.... was hoping i could dig out more dat u haf sent.... i've collected lotsa postcards since den... have not used dem fer yrs.... but i guess dat was it... the rest r supposed to be kept wif me deep down inside.... the tings u wrote makes me wonder if i took more initiative den i shld.... perhaps i did...i used to send cards to everyone during their bdaes n on festive seasons.... but i've lost dat too.....=]
i dunno how long i'm gg to kip them till i'm running out of space
all dat i've lost....makes me treasure wad i haf now... but one ting fer sure....i'm back to my passive self.... now..perhaps dat sounds a lil saddening at the beginning of a new yr...oh well...mabbe tis will help....hee...
