todae's the dae~!!! arggghhhh~ *gasp gasp gasp* -sweat sweat sweat- got tis staunch feeling....oh no....^choy choy choy^....and it's like no other times when results r released....tis one determines lots....whether i can grad...i'm not greedy....i onli nid to pass everyting.....i'm collecting 'good luck's now....anione wanna donate cos i nid lots??? thankew in advance...haa... ~deep breath~ *pray hard*
twenty-seven daes.
ends at 1:31 AM
Sunday, May 29, 2005Y
the funeral
the funeral.
attended a wake just now of my grandmother's brother...he's realli a nice man....one hoo's so soft-spoken, caring n alwiz carrying a smile on his face....a very kind person i wld sae....tho i hardly interact wif him, i rem how nice he was to us when i was a lil kid...n like mani others as we grew up, we seldom meet up or visit him at his house til mths b4 when his condition suddenly worsened...cancer....but he's lucky to haf hung on fer more den a yr or so wif times when he was almost well n about...spent thousands on medical fees n even got the best doc arnd....thank goodness dey r quite well to do....but alas...he lost to the illness...*mourn fer a min*
it was thru these few mths dat i started to understand the 'atmosphere' of his family....3 children...all had 2 kids of their own...but within each family there're lil secrets behind each of them....pretty interesting....picked up all these gossips during the wake from my parents n my grandma n bits n pieces here n there....
the eldest son had one son n one dotter....the dotter alwiz changing bfs...hmm...quarrelled wif mum during the wake....the son...big spender...acs boi....amazingly, i heard from my sis dat he is quite filial to his grandpa (the deceased)....
the second was the dotter....stopped toking to her husband....alwiz gg clubbing n rumored to haf a bf outside...hmm....the poor husband is kinda ru zui to the household n has not much sae at home.....
the youngest son had two lovely kids...one boi one ger....n a very pretty nurse wife....tink dey r quite the perfect family here....the kids r super guai...very courteous....ultimately so well brought-up.....the two never fight nor quarrel.....never haf i seen such nice children....dey r realli the pride of their parents.....*envy*...behind it all, i heard the beautiful mum was an adopted child....so i presume she has a hidden side of her....n thus vows to bring up the best kids in the world....eh...hee...dat's onli my imagination lar....
in this household, my gim poh...the wife of my gu gong....holds the authority....i must sae she has quite a different thinking from others....dey run a business n everyone in the house helps out at their two shops....all the children n their spouses...n dey get paid quite little each wif everyone getting the same pay....all 3 families lived in the same block in a condo....3 units dat is....but seldom had dinner together b4....my gim poh gets frustrated wif unexpected incidents or pple easily...n will show it on the face directly...not leaving ani ground fer the other party....without concrete reason, she will not follow in wad others sae....fer eg, usu spouse of the deceased is not supposed to go fer the cremation but she insisted on gg even tho the priests had advised her not to....she gets upset easily so everyone is so fearful of her....brrr.....another rule of hers is dat: no one is to cry at the wake....somebody cried n was scolded by her....well...trying to understand tis point....i came up wif the explanation dat perhaps crying means dat my gu gong will b missed n had not been cherished when he was still alive....??? does it make sense? hmm...well..... but her reason was dat she din wanted it to b a noisy affair....everyting was simplified...no trumpets no gongs.....just a quiet affair.....dat was against the chinese tradition tho.....
one funeral n i've discovered so much bout these pple.....i noe it's bad to bitch bout others...but kinda find dem quite interesting....haiz...no matter wad....i hope dey realli missed their dad, their grandpa.....but it's a bit hard to believe when most of dem r in an 'ok' mode....no one seen crying....no one showed dey valued the funeral....or perhaps dey did but all in their hearts.....*shrug*
-rest in peace, gu gong- ~pray~
twenty-five daes.
ends at 1:36 AM
Friday, May 27, 2005Y
lost
Lost.
life's pretty meaningless when everyday u stay home....watch tv from dusk til dawn n go sleep again....bin trying to look fer the goal in my life...but i'm just too damn lazi to go figure out....everyting dat i wanted to do...i never did...or dat i planned to do....i never realise dem....wad's gg on wif my life??? guess i'm just being too comfortable wif my life dat i cant be bothered to change it....or u can also call me serene the procrastinator....i dunno y but i just wan to 'wait fer my results' (to be released on tuesday *gulp*) n decide wad i wan to do in life...tink dey call tis escapism...n no doubt, i'm one such escapee...=)
been reading a self-help book on understanding myself....but somehow...no help to me...perhaps i'm not focussing on myself but just reading the book page by page....perhaps all along thruout my life i've lost sight of wad i wan to do due to the surrounding environment...the outside factors r pushing me to somewhere where the inside element of me is retaliating....but becos i've reached thus far....it's quite impossible to get to where i ferst begun...dey call it the sunken cost...yep...
i'm standing at the crossroad...not noeing where to head...so i believe in standing still n not pursuing aniting else unless i'm sure dat tis is where dat will lead to my destination....i'm just too afraid to move on cos one wrong move will lead me elsewhere....i lack the confidence n courage to even take dat very ferst step...n tho i may noe dis much about myself (despite alwiz claiming dat i dunno myself well)....i cant seem to get myself out of tis tinking....been trying hard to rid myself of the low self-esteem....believe me....dunno ever since when has my self-esteem gone lower n lower...haa...hmm....
u may tink i'm now low in my pits or sounding quite sad n pitiful....but no...i'm just being contented wif my life....n very contented dat is....not wanting ani negative changes but oso in the hope of finding the light amist the clouds....hmm....shld go into somemore deep thinking...(^.<)
twenty-three daes.
ends at 12:15 PM
Sunday, May 22, 2005Y
updates from hk
hOnG KoNg... Shop. Eat. Shop. Eat.
i'm back from hk!!! woah~ shopping for 4 consecutive daes can realli be good exercise man...esp in hong kong...but too bad i've been eating all sorts of junk foods these few daes....~can't slim down again~ now i'm starting to get a phobia of long stretches of straight roads and stairs liao...haa...apart from dat, still must kip pace wif the people there...they walk so hurriedly...kip making us stressed that we r blocking the wae...rule number one: alwiz kip rite on escalators...dey over take on the left...dun ask me y...rule number two: dun b misled by the arrows on the roads...if it reads "look left b4 u cross" with an arrow pointing left, it means the vehicles come in from the RIGHT...tink we r too conditioned to tinking dat the arrows r the direction of the traffic flow...best is look both sides if u're confused...hee....rule number three: polish up on map reading....cos all streets look similar...n there is practically no one spot where u can stand fer long to figure where exactly on the map u r....rule number four: if after some time u r still quite lost....ask....erm....ask hooever hoo walks abit slower than the rest....catch them...n try mix-matching cantonese if u tink it sounds pretty ok...otherwise...try chinese den english....worse come to worse...try pointing n act mute....haa....chuyun is like a young child learning canto...trying to piece each word into a sentence....i'm like the mute...can understand but no idea how to even try to speak it....well...poor chiew ting is the total alien...cant speak n understand....it's pretty tough not to talk the whole dae k...haa....rule number five: travel arnd using the mtr....cos u wldn't wan to spend time being stuck in a jam....yep...
the flight there was pritty exciting...the turbulence was quite strong...the feeling of free fall is definitely not a gd experience...but tink valuair is not too bad as compared to my previous budget airline...day one was their public holidae so practically everywhere we went was crowded...the theme streets were so packed that we couldnt shop at all....could onli look at faces instead of shopping...imagine walking fer streets n streets without buying aniting....no sense of self-fulfillment...at the end of the dae...we were so tired n was wondering how r we gg to get by the 3 daes ahead..
day two is the day tour...went to a couple of places of interest..went for dim sum breakfast n lunch at some restaurant which was not realli nice...golden bauhinia....repulse bay (where a number of celebs live)...aberdeen fishing village...one of the temples...ocean park....plus some dried food n jewellery stalls....rule number six: if ani of the tour guides in the tour group wanna take photo of u...pls dun let him do it....he'll develop the pics onto souvenirs n make u pay fer it....he shocked us when he took out the souvenir plates n 2 other pics n charge us at HK$200 (~S$40) everyone was quite stunned..all paiseh to reject him since he had alreadi printed dem...but i firmly told him i dun wan it...but ct n cy were wondering wad he'll do wif our pics...tho dat thot did cross my mind, i refuse to tink ani further...haa....well...in the end...being nice souls all willing to b put on the chopping board saying "chop mi, the cai tou"....we bot one out of the three he shoved to us....argh....still feeling abit sore...but one of the nice uncle from the tour group beside me told me tis was considered cheap oreadi...he once kena twice the price we're paying fer....ooo....dat realli did comfort us abit but kinda pity the uncle...
ocean park sounds cool....but i tink the best part of it is the dolphins' performance...dey r brilliant n so humane!! makes me love dolphins even more....*muack* the flips were so swift dat i wasnt in time to take pic of dat moment...n their coordination wif the trainers were perfect...no flaws....amazing....the theme park was quite small...onli took the pirate ship....the others were either too exciting or not in use...the cable car ride up was shaky....as steep as the one in genting....the view on the top of the ocean park was nice tho...n yes....we gotta walk alot...again...
went shopping at tsim sha tsui...grandville road aft recommendations from the tour guide n friends...n ironically aft walking streets aft streets, we ended up having dinner at the same place we went to on the previous dae without realising it....such a coincidence...does dat mean we haf been walking in rounds??? erm....
the shopping centres were realli meant fer the high-enders...n other shopping areas were the streets....no mid-level shopping centres...so all shopping centres can practically be ruled out....so third dae ended up shopping the places we oreadi went to on dae one...but was glad we went fer round two....cos we picked up quite some good bargains...the intermittent rain was no barrier to us...haa...we could alwiz go into some dessert stall n hang arnd.....others wld hang arnd outside the stalls n wait fer the rain to stop...if it were in s'pore...they would have been chased out or asked to quit blocking the entrance...not in hk....=) the dessert stalls are a must-try...never regretted trying the mango with coconut milk ice blended....i tink...*drool*
the people in hong kong are all quite good-looking....haa...even the bellboys in my hotel...hmm....the gers r pritty too....makes me feel so demoralised.....hmmph~ but overall i feel there r more shuai ges den mei nus....hee...mabbe cos i onli focus on the guys....oops...=X the frequency of having a shuai ge walk past u in hk is mani times more den one in orchard road....haiz....starting to miss hk man...haa....been dreaming dat i'm still in hk these few nites....still cant tune myself back to spore....
will alwiz remember the tour guide uncle yeung man...haa...so 'fatherly' giving so mani advices in life....bit naggy tho...haa....but damn paiseh when he shouted to the 3 of us at the back of the coach on our wae back to hk airport dat he wanted us to bring our bfs the next time we go over to hk.....diaoz...haa....fer those of u out there keen on gg hk...it's a nice place...wun regret gg but dun stay there fer too long....cos eventualli u'll get tired of shopping....haa....but sorrie ar...not me...thot i would boycott shopping fer like one mth...but no....mi now got more urge to go shopping.....hee....(^.<)v
eighteen daes.
ends at 11:01 PM
Friday, May 13, 2005Y
flu
on mc...down on flu....*sniff*....voice becum so nasal... i must get well by sunday!!! -happie fri the 13th- argh...
nine days.
ends at 3:16 PM
Sunday, May 08, 2005Y
070505
lazi me....din post aniting online fer a couple of daes..hee...it turned out dat i played mahjong at chalet again....i'm just predestined to play mahjong at chalets...of all daes it had to rain!!! spoil my cycling trip...haiz...guess i gotta start exercising another time...sad...oh yar....one disgusting ting dat happened to me...n possibly to anione else....while i was on the train to eunos, n was standing in one of the cabins wif my back facing a man...suddenly i felt a splat of sth on my thigh...n guess wad....it's the man's gluey sticky big splat of mucus!!! *puke* couldn't wait to get off the train to sterilise dat part of my thigh man....eeeeuuukkkksss...
hmm....been staying home rotting fer two daes...but i'm still pretty enjoying the life lidat...too bad i got a sorethroat...realli put off by the thot of trying to speak...tons of h20 dun seem to help...argh...
tmr's a special dae...a special dae fer him n her...fer us all....n fer he/she....kinda excited tho it's just a lunch...wanna gif dem my blessings n wish dem well....stay happie ferever...i hope....*shrug*
four days.
ends at 9:40 AM
Wednesday, May 04, 2005Y
hOnG kOnG...shop. eat. till i drop.
yippeee!!! finally my trip's cfm....poof....aft gg arnd the whole of chinatown lookin fer agencies....destination: hOnG kOnG from 16th may till 19th may 2005....alwiz wanted to go there.....hee...shoppers' paradise...book tics on the spot man....realli not my style....haa...must realli sae i'm improving frm my indecisiveness....hmm...but it's like...todae's the ferst time gg out wif chuyun n chiewting tog aft noeing fer yrs....n den str awae book tics...haa....but i'm sure we're gonna enjoy ourselves shoppin n eating til we drop!!
cycling's on the agenda fer tmr....poof....long time no cycle...n me gg to do my stunt!! -- cycling wif blades....haa...when i dun even noe how to blade....can imagine me clumsy n all n falling here n there wif lotsa bruises....yikes....gg fer meimei's bbq too....when the 'hidden' agenda is matchmaking session.....duhz....i'll rather depend on SDU man...haa....sorrie ar meimei...i anti-social....
oh no oh no...it's two+....mi gonna age again.....sobz